60 seconds

i'm watching myself disappear
i can feel my soul drifting
i am trying to save it, chase after and retain it, but it's long gone.

i'm alone.

there are weeds intertwining themselves around my heart, sowing themselves in and out, securing it. the inside remain in and the outside remain out.

they become tighter and i gasp...

i can't breathe, i can't breathe!

the expectations, the accusations, the deadlines, the pressure, the heartache, the sorrow, the sadness, the hatred chase me as i search high and low for that soul.

the soul i intend to keep, even if it were just for a minute. (just for a minute. only for a minute. i need that minute!)

i am slowing down, the weeds are holding me back. they wrap themselves thickly around my chest and arms.

i can hardly move.

my heart has been sealed, it's safe and sound.

except, i am one soul less and i have shut love out.

loneliness doesn't know a better friend than me.

Notes about that gurl.

Hello. Hi. Meisie. Sunshine. Baby. Love. Senorita. Girly. Gurl. Girl. Temmy.

Hey. Boy. Boychie. Seuntjie. Baby. Love. Senor. My love.

I love you. You love me too. I miss you. You miss me too. I think I am inlove today. I think it should be over tomorrow. I don't know how I feel right now. Come home, please. When I see you, I'll tell you. What do you want from me? Do you want this? I'm happy. Me too. I want you. I want to feel the same way you do. When you say you love me, I feel it. I never promised you a fairytale. I tried. I am trying. Thank you. I need you. It's over? The chapter. Our book. The story. It's over.

There was something there.

That gurl had a name once.

I'm not that strong without you

Months of silence,
tears of rage,
days of silence,
revolting pain,
hours of silence,
there's not a chance,
minutes of silence,
my heart feels lost,
seconds of silence,
it can't be true,
Hello, you say, how are you?

I can breath again.

"I need you like the ocean needs the tide..." - Marcos Hernandez

turn your lights down low

we used to be like a melody, you and me. we went to together like the never ending lines of poetry. we found solace in each others healing. we taught each other the limitless end of feeling. we laughed at one another and cried together.
we turned our lights down low.

we helped each other dream and made one another love. we unblocked our hearts, destroyed our walls and came together as one. we talked all the ways we could and when talking failed us, we knew our writing wouldn't. we did what we knew best for the best gifts we could give one another.
we turned our lights down low.

we learned the music that fed the souls we craved and in turn shared a passion for sharing. we become one in spirit. one with poetry. one, together.
we turned our lights down low.

we turned our lights down low.

"loving you is like a song i replay every three minutes and thirty seconds of every day..."
- Lauren Hill, Turn your lights down low.

you found another me.

i used to think that losing myself meant i disapeared,
you reminded me that my heart's still here.

i believed that love was an overplayed song,
you taught me the words, now i sing along.

before my soul was a shattered mirror,
you replaced it with something clearer.

i was imperceptive, stuck in a hopeless maze,
you saw me, now i see you, my eyes hold your gaze.

i fell into a never ending darkeness,
you lit the black with with courage, now my skies are cloudless.

i lost the me i used to know,
you found someone knew.

i drowned in my own emptiness,
you rescued me from woe.

i tormented my aching mind with images of hate,
you showed me more than happiness and with that gave me faith.

i cried tears of pure agony, bitterness lived on my tongue,
you released the ail inside my heart, my healing became your poem.

i didn't know, i couldn't see, what you may already have percieved,
but now i know and see and feel, you found another me.